NEEDING BEDTIME

i know because i've snapped.  you know what happens.  when mrs. grumpity-grump comes to life.  suddenly my cheerful, hello welcome to red ledges, how may i help you personality has transformed into a fire breathing dragon. don't look at me wrong.  i might bite your head off.  don't ask me to do anything.  i'll pitch a fit.  don't bother me.  i might scream at you.

and then when mrs. grumps start to edge offstage, waiting to make her next surprise debut, the tears start.  mr. overwhelmingly-lonely-and-sad-and-not-sure-where-i-fit-in-right-now.. yeah, he visits me next.  man, i hate him.  he seems to be visiting a lot this week.  go away, sir.  and don't come back another day.  in fact, how does never sound?

i know that when this happens, i need some therapy in the form of my scriptures and my journal.  it's time to shove grumps and loneliness away.  it's time to go to sleeeeep. {sleep. what a lovely thing these days. in college, i gladly gave up sleep for social life and not-so-gladly for studying. now i wouldn't give up my precious sleep time for aaaanything. i'm sure that'll change when i move back down to provo.}

as much as i'm attached to mrs. grumpy and mr. sad and lonely -- or at least, they're attached to me -- i need to get rid of these two in my life and make better friends with mrs. i-love-life-all-the-time-no-matter-what and mr. keep-your-chin-up.  because that's who i am!

i'm off to bed.  hopefully mrs. lovin life and mr. optimistic will visit me in the morning.